“…jointly organized by all the major religious groups in the country…”
Imagine celebrating anyone’s birthday and leaving them out of the celebration…
ChickenHead
4 years ago
Jesus was regrettably unable to attend his 2019th birthday party for the 1987th time.
In his place, he sent his representative, Saint Claus, to insure a festive mood for both Christians and non-Christians alike.
A spokesman said Jesus has plans to attend a future event where entertainment will be fireworks, trumpet music, a zombie resurrection, and a special invatation-only aerial acrobatic show for Christians.
The other 69% of the global population will be gifted 7 years of tribulation.
setnaffa
4 years ago
CH is a Pre-Trib Rapturist?!?!? Whodathunk it?
Now if I could get him to read The Book a bit more often and get a few more details of the “Homecoming Party” correct…
For example:
1. CH, I am leery of predictions of how many will be “saved”. I’d like to know who’s been filling your head with this. No, strike that. Actually, I’d recommend listening to John Piper or Francis Chan instead.
2. There are estimates of Jesus being born in Bethlehem between 6 BC to 4 BC (Herod the Great who ordered His death died in 4 BC); so, except for those who invited Jesus into their hearts, it has been closer to 1,990 to 1,992 years.
3. Also, the word “zombie” strongly implies decay, which would indicate “the other team”… Even Hollywood has Zombie = Evil pretty well established. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L6aA3fiwTs0
Setnaffa, you wild and crazy guy, don’t take me too seriously.
– Actually, I always heard the Tribulation was before the rapture… which, as a child, I thought was pretty unfair… a running theme in my early evaluation of Christianity. I’d like to think, in the spirit of fair play, the Christians will be gone and the non-believers will have 7 years to get on the program with echos of “told you so” to help them along.
But I suppose a tribulation before the rapture is a good way to weed out the Christians that didn’t stock up on guns and ammo.
Though that seems a bit unfair as well… those who didn’t prepare get to go directly to heaven while those who did prepare have to tough it out.
I am not a big fan of perverse incentives… where wrong actions are rewarded and correct thinking is punished.
But I am hardly an expert on this and perhaps my understanding is flawed.
– I have no idea how many will be saved. I just used the percentage of Christians and non-Christians in the world as a rough estimate. Presumably some non-belivers will be converted and some Christians are using religion as a tool for earthly pursuits and will be left behind when the deal goes down. But those number are probably close. In New Guinea, I met some seemingly nice people who were never really given the chance to accept Jesus Christ as their lord and savior. I really don’t want to believe they will spend an eternity in hell for something completely not their fault. This level of unfairness bothered me as a child and bothers me now. Nobody has ever given me a comfortable explanation that reconciles God’s infinite love with sending somebody to hell for eternity for not believing in the son of a god they never heard of.
– You are likely right on those dates. The joke seemed more clear if we started at zero.
– I’m not sure what the dead rising will look like. I just assumed zombies. I helped a Christian Korean family move some tombs. After some hard digging with an elderly father and their only son, I found… well… zombies. I concluded the rapture is not going to be a pretty sight. Though it could all be a metaphor as TechnoJesus fires up the cloning vats.
In the end, I have no idea.
But do have a Merry Christmas.
setnaffa
4 years ago
CH, Thank you! I’m already having a Merry Christmas! π π π
We had a wonderful time at various activities all weekend and the best are yet to come (Uncle’s house on 12/25)…
I found a 1942 photo of my grandfather in his Officer Candidate School uniform online, printed and framed it, and plan to give it to my uncle, last of that generation. π π π
Here are two short hints for your further research, when you get around to it:
A. 1 John 3:2 English Standard Version (ESV): “Beloved, we are God’s children now, and what we will be has not yet appeared; but we know that when he appears we shall be like him, because we shall see him as he is.”
B. 2 Corinthians 5:4 English Standard Version (ESV): “For while we are still in this tent, we groan, being burdenedβnot that we would be unclothed, but that we would be further clothed, so that what is mortal may be swallowed up by life.”
“…jointly organized by all the major religious groups in the country…”
Imagine celebrating anyone’s birthday and leaving them out of the celebration…
Jesus was regrettably unable to attend his 2019th birthday party for the 1987th time.
In his place, he sent his representative, Saint Claus, to insure a festive mood for both Christians and non-Christians alike.
A spokesman said Jesus has plans to attend a future event where entertainment will be fireworks, trumpet music, a zombie resurrection, and a special invatation-only aerial acrobatic show for Christians.
The other 69% of the global population will be gifted 7 years of tribulation.
CH is a Pre-Trib Rapturist?!?!? Whodathunk it?
Now if I could get him to read The Book a bit more often and get a few more details of the “Homecoming Party” correct…
For example:
1. CH, I am leery of predictions of how many will be “saved”. I’d like to know who’s been filling your head with this. No, strike that. Actually, I’d recommend listening to John Piper or Francis Chan instead.
2. There are estimates of Jesus being born in Bethlehem between 6 BC to 4 BC (Herod the Great who ordered His death died in 4 BC); so, except for those who invited Jesus into their hearts, it has been closer to 1,990 to 1,992 years.
3. Also, the word “zombie” strongly implies decay, which would indicate “the other team”… Even Hollywood has Zombie = Evil pretty well established. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L6aA3fiwTs0
And what does “Pre-Trib” mean? Here is one preacher’s viewpoint; but he lists all the Bible verses so you can read and decide: https://gracethrufaith.com/end-times-prophecy/rapture-which-rapture/
Setnaffa, you wild and crazy guy, don’t take me too seriously.
– Actually, I always heard the Tribulation was before the rapture… which, as a child, I thought was pretty unfair… a running theme in my early evaluation of Christianity. I’d like to think, in the spirit of fair play, the Christians will be gone and the non-believers will have 7 years to get on the program with echos of “told you so” to help them along.
But I suppose a tribulation before the rapture is a good way to weed out the Christians that didn’t stock up on guns and ammo.
Though that seems a bit unfair as well… those who didn’t prepare get to go directly to heaven while those who did prepare have to tough it out.
I am not a big fan of perverse incentives… where wrong actions are rewarded and correct thinking is punished.
But I am hardly an expert on this and perhaps my understanding is flawed.
– I have no idea how many will be saved. I just used the percentage of Christians and non-Christians in the world as a rough estimate. Presumably some non-belivers will be converted and some Christians are using religion as a tool for earthly pursuits and will be left behind when the deal goes down. But those number are probably close. In New Guinea, I met some seemingly nice people who were never really given the chance to accept Jesus Christ as their lord and savior. I really don’t want to believe they will spend an eternity in hell for something completely not their fault. This level of unfairness bothered me as a child and bothers me now. Nobody has ever given me a comfortable explanation that reconciles God’s infinite love with sending somebody to hell for eternity for not believing in the son of a god they never heard of.
– You are likely right on those dates. The joke seemed more clear if we started at zero.
– I’m not sure what the dead rising will look like. I just assumed zombies. I helped a Christian Korean family move some tombs. After some hard digging with an elderly father and their only son, I found… well… zombies. I concluded the rapture is not going to be a pretty sight. Though it could all be a metaphor as TechnoJesus fires up the cloning vats.
In the end, I have no idea.
But do have a Merry Christmas.
CH, Thank you! I’m already having a Merry Christmas! π π π
We had a wonderful time at various activities all weekend and the best are yet to come (Uncle’s house on 12/25)…
I found a 1942 photo of my grandfather in his Officer Candidate School uniform online, printed and framed it, and plan to give it to my uncle, last of that generation. π π π
Here are two short hints for your further research, when you get around to it:
A. 1 John 3:2 English Standard Version (ESV): “Beloved, we are God’s children now, and what we will be has not yet appeared; but we know that when he appears we shall be like him, because we shall see him as he is.”
B. 2 Corinthians 5:4 English Standard Version (ESV): “For while we are still in this tent, we groan, being burdenedβnot that we would be unclothed, but that we would be further clothed, so that what is mortal may be swallowed up by life.”